Empowering Parents of Neurodivergent Children: A Journey with Harry the Crow
Parent-Led Interventions for Neurodivergent Children. Raising my daughter, who was diagnosed as having high-functioning Asperger’s, is not just about being a parent; it’s about finding patience, love, and determination you never knew you had. It means becoming not just a caregiver but also an advocate, a creative thinker, and often an improviser. This is my journey—a journey that led me to create ‘Harry the Crow,’ a character born out of necessity that became a lifeline for both my daughter and me. For more personal anecdotes and outtakes from these heartfelt adventures, you can read more at Stories of Harry the Crow and Ffion: Heartfelt Adventures in Autism and Imagination.
Finding New Ways Through Parent-Led Interventions
When my daughter started having intense meltdowns, I felt lost. There were times when no amount of comforting words or gestures could reach her. I needed to find a way to connect with her, to enter her world. Like many parents, I turned to what I knew best—my bond with her and my intuition. This is where parent-led interventions come in—simple but powerful methods where we, as parents, do more than just watch. We observe, adapt, and use what our kids respond to, tapping into those moments of connection only we understand.
One day, during a particularly tough meltdown, I tried something different. I turned my hand into a crow named Harry. At first, it was just a playful and unexpected distraction, something to shift her focus. But very soon, “Harry” became more than that. He became a bridge—someone she could talk to when words felt too hard. Harry could make sense of the chaos, turning a scary moment into something lighter. And through Harry, I found a way to reach her that I never thought possible.
Harry the Crow wasn’t just a one-time thing; he became part of an entire world we could dive into together. For more stories from these adventures, visit Harry the Crow and Ffion. For example, we created ‘Harry’s Garden,’ a magical place where Harry would take us on adventures, discovering hidden treasures and making friends with other animals. These adventures helped my daughter understand her emotions while feeling safe and supported. During meltdowns, when she couldn’t find the words, she would still talk to Harry. Through this character, I could connect with her without needing her to come directly to me. We would explore imaginary places, solve little mysteries, or just have fun in a world that made her feel secure. What started as a hand puppet became a way of storytelling, a safe space, and a routine that made her feel understood.
I learned that we, as parents, can be much more creative than we realize. When we allow ourselves to get lost in our children’s worlds, they feel it—they feel seen, understood, and supported. It’s not about having the perfect words; it’s about being present, even if it’s through something as simple as a puppet.
Advocacy and the Journey of Connection
Being the parent of a neurodivergent child taught me resilience and advocacy in ways I never expected. I remember sitting in meetings, feeling like no one else truly understood what my daughter needed. But because I knew her so well, I pushed for what she needed, even if it meant going against the norm or standing my ground. I learned that, as parents, we are our children’s strongest advocates, and that strength comes from truly knowing them.
Through Harry, my daughter learned that her feelings, no matter how big or scary, were valid and manageable. I realized that these small acts of storytelling and play were building resilience in her, one story at a time. It’s a journey of trust and growth that I could never have predicted when I first came up with Harry the Crow.
Building a Framework for Other Parents: Parent-Led Interventions for Neurodivergent Children
Looking back, I wish I had written down those stories and the moments of connection they sparked. These simple, parent-led tools often have the biggest impact. Here’s what I’d share with any parent on a similar path:
Observe and Adapt: Pay attention to what soothes your child, and be ready to adapt. No two days—or children—are the same, and it’s often about finding what works in that particular moment.
Imagination Is Key: You don’t need fancy toys or trained professionals to engage your child. Sometimes the most powerful characters come from within, made up in the moment with just a voice or a hand.
Document the Journey: Record the small wins, the characters that work, and the stories that connect. These can be lifelines on tough days and could even become resources for other parents.
A Community of Shared Stories
If there’s one thing I hope other parents learn from Harry’s journey, it’s this: you’re not alone. Parenting a neurodivergent child can feel isolating, but many others are on the same journey. By sharing Harry’s story, I’ve connected with parents around the world. There’s comfort in knowing that these small tools—these simple, made-up characters—can make such a difference.
Building a supportive community for Parent-Led Interventions for Neurodivergent Children doesn’t require grand gestures. Sometimes it starts by sharing our experiences, by being open about our struggles and victories. Together, we are stronger, and together, we are building a network of resilience and understanding for our kids and ourselves.
In Closing: Trust Your Intuition
Parenting a neurodivergent child is no ordinary journey. It requires patience, creativity, and a level of determination that only other parents on this path can understand. So if you’re feeling unsure, know that you’re not alone. The simple tools you create at home—the stories and characters—have the power to make a difference.
To all the parents out there, here’s to our unique ways of connecting, to Harry the Crow, and to all the characters born out of love. We are building a world where our children feel seen, heard, and cherished, one story at a time.
Alright, folks, let’s get real about the Body-mind connection. Life can be an absolute circus, can’t it? We’re constantly juggling a dozen things at once, from family commitments to work stress, and often it feels like we’re one step away from the whole tent collapsing on us. So, here’s a crazy idea: what if you could improve your life by getting your body and mind to finally shake hands and work together?
I’ve been around the block enough times to know that when you’re out of sync—when your mind’s racing a million miles an hour and your body’s running on fumes—it’s a fast track to burnout. But here’s the kicker: our mental and physical health are connected, deeply so. Think of them as two best mates who are sometimes too stubborn to admit they need each other. Embracing the body-mind connection is not only possible but crucial for a better life.
In this article, we’re not just diving into fluffy wellness tips. We’re talking about grounded, practical ways to bring some balance into your life—stuff like mindfulness, a bit of energy healing with Reiki (no crystals or chanting required promise), and a realistic approach to nutrition. Let’s get into it.
The Science Behind the Body-Mind Connection
Let’s start with a bit of brainy talk, shall we? There’s actual science behind the body-mind connection, and it’s more than just mumbo-jumbo. Research shows that stress, negative thoughts, and emotional baggage can all impact your physical health—everything from your immune system to your heart health can take a hit when you’re carrying around mental clutter. And the other way around? Physical symptoms like fatigue or chronic pain can be massive red flags from your body, screaming at you to take care of your mental health.
At the core of all this is energy. Nope, not in some magical sense—I’m talking about the physical and emotional energy you put into everything you do. When it gets blocked or burned out, that’s when the wheels start coming off. Enter Reiki: an ancient practice that’s all about moving that energy around, releasing those blocks, and bringing balance. But we’ll get into that later. For now, just remember: mind and body need to work together like a decent tag team.
Mindfulness and Meditation: Finding Some (Realistic) Peace
I get it. Most people think mindfulness is about sitting cross-legged on a mat, staring at a candle, and trying to “find your centre.” But I promise you, it’s a lot more practical than that. Mindfulness is just about tuning in to what’s happening here and now. When you’re mindful, you notice your thoughts without letting them boss you around, and you’re more aware of what’s happening in your body—like noticing the tension creeping up when you’re stressed.
Start small. Five minutes in the morning or while you’re having a cup of tea, just focus on your breathing and pay attention to any thoughts that pop up. It won’t be perfect, but it will help you handle stress before it builds up. Studies show that mindfulness can reduce cortisol (that pesky stress hormone) and improve focus and emotional stability. It’s like giving your brain a regular tune-up. Trust me, it works.
Reiki: No Chanting, Just Realigning
Reiki might sound a bit mystical, but stay with me here. It’s an energy healing technique that focuses on unblocking the places where stress and negative energy get stuck. Think of it as hitting the “reset” button on your body’s energy flow. Reiki doesn’t require you to do anything bizarre or uncomfortable—you just need to be open to it. A good practitioner can help you clear that energy, making you feel lighter, less stressed, and maybe even a bit more at peace.
I used to be sceptical about Reiki myself. But after a session or two, it was like some of the noise in my head got turned down, and I felt this sense of calm that was real. So, if you’re on the fence, give it a go. Worst-case scenario, you get a chance to relax. Best case? You walk out feeling better than you have in ages.
Food for the Soul: Integrative Nutrition
Look, I love a good takeaway as much as the next person, but there’s something to be said about feeding your body right if you want it to serve you well. When I say integrative nutrition, I’m talking about thinking beyond just “eating healthy.” It’s about choosing foods that support your mental as well as physical health.
For example, omega-3 fatty acids found in fish and nuts have been shown to improve brain function and reduce anxiety. Leafy greens packed with magnesium help your body handle stress better. And don’t get me started on water—staying hydrated alone can boost your mood and energy. Integrative nutrition doesn’t mean giving up every indulgence; it’s about balance and adding in things that fuel both your body and mind.
Getting Started with Nutrition: Practical Steps
Add Omega-3s: Foods like salmon, walnuts, and chia seeds. Good for the brain, good for the body.
Greens Are Gold: Spinach, kale, and broccoli are not only nutrient-dense but also support stress management.
Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate: Water is your best friend. Start each day with a big glass to kick things off.
Bringing It All Together: Realistic, Daily Practices
Alright, you’re probably thinking, “That all sounds great, but how do I fit this into my life?” You don’t have to overhaul everything at once. Start with one or two things that feel doable and build from there. Here’s a little blueprint to get you started.
Incorporate Nutrient-Dense Foods: Add a handful of nuts or a leafy salad to your lunch.
Move Your Body: Go for a walk or stretch—it’s a great way to let off steam.
Set Boundaries for Self-Care: Say no to things that drain you, and yes to things that refill your cup.
A Bit of History on Holistic Health
Holistic health practices have been around longer than our modern rush-around-like-headless-chickens lifestyle. Ancient cultures—think Egypt, India, and China—were all about balance. They knew that taking care of the mind and body as one could stave off illness and improve quality of life. Back then, they didn’t have the research we do today, but they understood the value of lifestyle, preventative care, and emotional balance. It’s only in recent years, as chronic stress and lifestyle diseases have skyrocketed, that people are realizing these ancient practices were onto something.
Today, people are coming back to holistic health, not as a trend but as a necessity. We’re starting to see the value of things like mindfulness, meditation, and integrative nutrition—and practices like Reiki are being embraced as powerful tools for stress relief and healing. I mean, if it works, why question it?
In Conclusion: The Journey to Balance
Life’s a ride, but you can enjoy it a lot more if you’re not constantly dragging your body behind your overworked mind. The body-mind connection is real, and nurturing it doesn’t have to mean selling your soul to a juice cleanse or joining a yoga retreat. It’s about practical, meaningful steps that make a difference, even if it’s just five minutes of mindfulness or a little more thought about what’s on your plate.
So, start small, listen to your body, and remember: you’re in charge of your well-being. The journey to a balanced, fulfilling life isn’t always easy, but trust me—it’s worth it. Take it from someone who’s been around the block and back again. The road to wellness isn’t always straight, but each step brings you closer to a life that feels just a bit lighter, a bit calmer, and a lot more worthwhile.
Navigating Dark Thoughts to Find Inner Strength. I have lost count of the days spent just lying in bed, consumed by the darkest thoughts. Each day felt like an endless cycle, each one just the same as the last, where I had become a zombie with little to no interest in anything at all.
It’s been about seven years since I wrote that first post, diving into the darkest parts of my mind and the struggles I was facing back then. I remember those days well—the weight, the endless cycle of bleakness, and how each day seemed like a copy of the last. Putting it out there wasn’t easy, but I knew it was something I had to share. Since then, a lot has changed. I’ve gone through my fair share of challenges, made strides I never thought I could, and found myself in places I never expected.
I won’t say I have it all figured out, but I’ve learned a lot about resilience, the power of community, and how to keep moving forward—even when it feels like everything’s pushing back. Revisiting those words now feels like seeing an old wound healed into a scar. I’m sharing this updated version because I know the journey through darkness is one that many people face, and if my experience can offer even a small light to someone else, then it’s worth every word.
The only bright spots were weekends—moments when I would have my daughter and the dog, and those were the only times I felt remotely alive. During the lowest points of those days, I often thought, what was the point? Why was I here? I would replay the same questions repeatedly in my mind, and the answers I imagined were always bleak. The thoughts scared me; they filled me with an intense fear and dread that seemed inescapable. Some of the thoughts were so dark, and I would run them over and over, like a loop I couldn’t break free from.
Suicide vs. Feeling Suicidal
There is a big difference between suicide and feeling suicidal. Feeling suicidal often means being overwhelmed by dark thoughts without necessarily wanting to act on them, whereas suicide involves a decision to end one’s life. Navigating Dark Thoughts to Find Inner Strength, Both share a similar mindset, but the key distinction lies in intent and action. It’s important to understand that feeling suicidal doesn’t always mean you want to die—it means you want the pain to end. It’s an emotional plea for an escape, and sometimes that escape feels impossible. Recognizing this difference can be the lifeline someone needs to understand they are not alone and that support is available.
Statistics and trends are very scary—for example, in 2021, over 700,000 people died by suicide worldwide. That number represents not just individuals, but families, friends, and communities torn apart by loss. Sadly, the stigma surrounding mental health still exists despite high-profile campaigns and efforts to raise awareness. Many people are afraid to seek help because they worry about being judged or misunderstood. We need to normalize these conversations and make it okay to admit that we are struggling. Mental health is just as important as physical health, and we need to treat it with the same level of care and attention.
How Would It End?
I often thought about how I would do it—how I would end the darkest thoughts, end the pain. In reality, the pain never ends; it just passes to those closest to you, those who love you unconditionally. This realization haunted me. I knew that if I ended my life, the burden would fall on my loved ones. They would have to carry the weight of my pain, and that was something I couldn’t bear. I hated the thought of causing them the kind of suffering that I was feeling.
I hate taking pills, so that wasn’t an option. Hanging myself or cutting myself—again, not an option. Jumping from something? No. I knew and had gone through it in my head so many times: it had to be water. Water has always had a draw to me, be it swimming in the river as a kid, paddleboarding, kayaking, or wild swimming. There is something about water that both calms me and connects with the deepest parts of my emotions. Most of my walks are near water—be it the canal, the coast, the river, or the waterfalls in the mountains. Water felt like a fitting place, somewhere that had always brought me peace, even in the darkest of times.
One Day
One day, I found myself in the car on the way to the sea. I had decided today was the day. There wouldn’t be many, if any, people at a secluded beach in atrocious weather. Music on, I knew exactly where I was going. In my mind, the darkest thoughts, and the pain I was in had to come to an end. I was exhausted—mentally, physically, and emotionally. It felt like I had nothing left to give.
I drove down the dual carriageway towards Newport, down Malpas Road, and onto the M4, heading west. As I approached Tredegar House, a song came on that jolted me, and snapped my mind out of its thought process—technically, this is called “breaking state.” It’s amazing how one moment, one song, can change everything. Pulling off the motorway, I drove around to Tredegar Park, parked up, turned the engine off, and cried like a baby. It wasn’t just a few tears—it was a full release, a deep, gut-wrenching sob that felt like it came from the core of my being.
Picking up my phone, the screen saver opened: a picture of me and Ffion. This brought me back to my senses. In that picture, we were smiling, truly happy, and I could see the love in her eyes. As I do every day, I give gratitude for her being in my life. I tell her in one way or another that I love her every day. I used to do the same with Lewis. They are my reasons for being, my reasons for fighting through the darkness. Sitting there, I opened my phone and sent her a message—just a simple “I Love You Tinker X.” It was enough. It was enough to remind me of what truly mattered, to pull me back from the edge.
Fear
At the basic level, fear guides our fight-or-flight responses and helps to keep us safe and alive. Fear heightens your senses and awareness; it keeps you alert and helps in better preparation. For example, when I was faced with a challenging hike, fear made me double-check my gear, plan my route more carefully, and stay focused throughout the journey. Fear, in that context, became my ally. The negative side of fear is when it holds you back from doing something positive—when it stops you from taking the steps that could lead to growth or happiness.
My fear at that point was never holding my Tinker again, never having a pint with my boy. Those fears became my reasons to keep going. They say we only grow on the other side of fear, and I truly believe that. Fear can help us to:
Focus and concentrate on what matters.
Heighten awareness of our surroundings and emotions.
Acknowledge and gain enlightenment about our struggles.
Prepare and plan for overcoming obstacles.
Dissect extremes and find balance.
Remove barriers that limit our potential.
Break the routine and push ourselves into new experiences.
Positive Fear
There are other positive aspects to fear and breaking out of the comfort zone. Fear pushes us to grow, to explore new paths we might not have considered before. It’s easy to stay in our comfort zones, where everything feels safe and predictable. But growth happens when we step beyond what is familiar and when we take risks despite our fears. It’s in those moments of vulnerability that we discover our true strength.
This post has been in draft for a while. I have held my finger over the publish button a few times and then just saved the draft. There is a vulnerability in sharing something so deeply personal, but I know that if my story can help even one person, then it is worth it.
Breaking the Silence
Constantly, I say we need to have a conversation regarding mental health every day, not just some random week in the year. My purpose in writing is to raise awareness—to let others know they are not alone and that there are plenty out there suffering the same feelings. The more we talk about it, the more we break down the barriers and stigma surrounding mental health. No one should feel ashamed or isolated because of their struggles.
Please feel free to share among friends, and among social media groups that you are in, and please, please, please talk. Check-in on the ones you have not seen in a while—those that have strangely gone quiet. Often, it’s the people who seem the strongest who are struggling the most. And as always, I am here at any time of the day or night to listen. It’s okay not to be okay, and it’s okay to reach out for help.
Building a Community
I am thinking of setting up a group where we get together to talk, go for walks, maybe even cook, and have open and supportive conversations. There is something powerful about sharing experiences and connecting with others who understand without judgment. I have lots of thoughts in my head at the moment on my direction and purpose, but one thing is for sure—they are positive, not the darkest thoughts I once had. I want to focus on growth, on healing, and on creating a community where we can all lift each other.
The only time I will be walking into the sea is for fun. I am trying to get in there soon—just have to work the timing between the seasonal storms. There are many health benefits to cold water—be it contrast showers or wild swimming—but that’s another post. Cold water has become a symbol of life for me, a way to embrace the present moment fully. It’s invigorating, it’s challenging, and it reminds me that I am alive.
Love to you all x
The Latest UK Suicide Statistics
In 2023, the UK registered 6,069 suicides, equating to an age-standardised mortality rate of 11.4 deaths per 100,000 people—the highest rate since 1999.
Gender Disparities:
Males: Accounted for approximately 75% of suicides, with a rate of 17.4 deaths per 100,000—the highest since 1999. ON
Females: Experienced a rate of 5.7 deaths per 100,000, the highest since 1994.
Age-Specific Rates:
Males aged 45 to 49: Had the highest rate at 25.5 deaths per 100,000.
Females aged 50 to 54: Had the highest rate at 9.2 deaths per 100,000.
Regional Variations:
England: The North West recorded the highest rate at 14.7 deaths per 100,000, while London had the lowest at 7.3 per 100,000.
Wales: Reported a rate of 14.0 deaths per 100,000, an increase from 12.5 per 100,000 in 2022.
These statistics underscore the persistent and significant public health challenge posed by suicide in the UK, highlighting the need for targeted prevention and support strategies.
FAQ: Navigating Dark Thoughts to Find Inner Strength
Q: What should I do if I feel overwhelmed by dark thoughts? A: Start by recognizing that you’re not alone, and many people face similar struggles. Reach out to someone you trust—a friend, family member, or mental health professional. Talking about what you’re going through can relieve some of the weight and help you gain perspective.
Q: How can I help someone I know who may be struggling with dark thoughts? A: Listen without judgment, show empathy, and avoid offering quick fixes. Let them know you’re there for them and encourage them to seek professional help if they’re open to it. Sometimes, just knowing someone cares can make a big difference.
Q: What’s the difference between feeling suicidal and actively wanting to end your life? A: Feeling suicidal often reflects a deep desire to escape pain, not necessarily a wish to die. Recognizing this difference is important, as it may help people realize they need support to manage that pain. If you or someone you know feels this way, seeking help can provide tools to navigate and reduce that pain safely.
Q: Are there daily practices that can help manage dark thoughts? A: Yes. Simple practices like mindfulness, journaling, spending time in nature, or even talking with a friend can help. Finding ways to connect with your body—like walking, breathing exercises, or physical hobbies—can also help you stay grounded.
Q: Is it normal to feel shame or fear about discussing mental health? A: Yes, unfortunately, the stigma surrounding mental health still affects many. But each time we speak up, we chip away at that stigma. Remember, seeking support shows strength, not weakness. It’s a positive step toward healing.
Organizations for Support and Help | Navigating Dark Thoughts to Find Inner Strength
If you or someone you know is struggling, consider reaching out to one of the following organizations:
UK-Based Resources
Mind Provides support, advice, and information for anyone experiencing mental health issues. Website: www.mind.org.uk Phone: 0300 123 3393
Samaritans Confidential support for people experiencing distress or despair. Available 24/7. Website: www.samaritans.org Phone: 116 123 (free)
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) Focused on preventing male suicide, offering support and a listening ear. Website: www.thecalmzone.net Phone: 0800 58 58 58
Shout A 24/7 crisis text service, free on major UK mobile networks, for anyone in crisis anytime. Text SHOUT to 85258
Rethink Mental Illness Provides advice, information, and support for those affected by mental illness. Website: www.rethink.org Phone: 0300 5000 927